Concussions and Lawn Chairs

Today, I got lost. Again.  How does a 31 year old lose herself in a neighbourhood she used to live in? I have no idea.  Stelllllaaaaa!  The only thing you can do is take a deep breath, open google maps, sort yourself out and laugh.  I've never taken myself too seriously, so turning my life into a punch line has actually been pretty easy.  What is surprising, however, is how therapeutic it has been. Whoever said that "laughter is the best medicine" probably had a concussion. (Actually chances are they didn't, but we can pretend!)  While we are on the topic of making light of my situation, I thought I would give you a list (I LOVE LISTs) of Stella's top ten most embarrassing (or amazing!) moments (in no particular order): 1. The lawn chair journal  See my blog on the topic.  I still get emails from Amazon recommending other journals with pictures on them.   2. The trouble with baking  I had a craving for peanut butter cookies and was determined to make a batch.  I m

I have been listening to the audio book "Option B" by Sheryl Sandberg.  One of the chapters (eek... chapter six I think) is about finding joy after a tragedy. I thought this passage was pretty powerful and I wanted to share: "When we look for joy, we often focus on the big moments. Graduating from school. Getting a job. Having a child. Getting reunited with family. But happiness is the frequency of positive experiences, not the intensity." What a concept! I have always been about intensity. Historically, I would waste my days planning the next big moment. I would spend my vacations planning my next vacation.  I believed that I would finally be truly happy when I got out of debt, when I got married, when I had kids, when I bought a house, or when I traveled  the world. WHEN. There was always a when. Never a now. Was I consistently happy? Nope. Nate (my Neuro Psychologist) is a huge fan of Eckhart Tolle who said that "people don't realize that now is all ther

A painting of the Serenity Prayer was hanging in my home as a child. (It may have been at my grandmother's house. I'll have to ask my mom later and get back to you. Remind me.) My point: I must have read the following words a million times: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference." But did I ever live by these words? Nope. In all honesty, my family is not very religious, so I never gave much thought to the prayer. It was just a nice piece of art. How is this relevant to my concussion? Good question. Let me tell you about my last appointment with my neuro-psychologist. (We're going to call him Nate, Neuro-Psychologist Nate.) The conversation went like this: Nate: "Good Morning! How has your week been?" Me: "Well.... Not so good. I cried in a doctor's office." Nate: "....."  I looked at him and knew that this was when I was

1. I am not a good writer. I would like to apologize for any spelling and grammatical errors. My editor is on holidays indefinitely and I have a brain injury. Enjoy! 2. My concussion occurred on February 19th, 2017. I wish I had a good story. I slipped or fainted, hit my chin on a heat register (based on the location of the blood splatter), and knocked myself out. I don't remember much from the day; only that it changed my life forever.  3. Post-concussion syndrome is terrible.  Webmd defines post-concussion syndrome "PCS" as "a medical problem that persists for a period of time after a head injury [usually a concussion or mild traumatic brain injury "mTBI")] has occurred. This period of time can range from weeks to months."   I'll admit that I knew very little about concussions before this injury, and I am still fascinated that one hit to the head could affect me emotionally, physically, mentally, and cognitively.  When you think

Don't worry! We are all confused. In late June 2017, the weather was getting warmer. I figured that since I would have a lot of down time this Summer with Stella, I should buy a lawn chair for the backyard.  Driving to the store was too overwhelming for me, so I did the next best thing and went on Amazon. (I love Amazon!) After what felt like hours of searching, I found the perfect chair for a very reasonable price. Or so I thought... The thing with concussions (aka "mild traumatic brain injuries" or "mTBIs") is that they can leave you terribly confused. I mean we've all been confused at one time or another, but the crazy thing about concussion confusion is that you are so confused that you don't even know that you're confused.  Confused yet? Good! Stella is confusing!  A few days later (Amazon is so quick), a package arrived for me, but it was the size of a book. (You'd think I would have clued in at this point that something wasn

Today I decided that 2017 was the best year of my life. (It's not what you think.) I didn't get engaged, married, or pregnant. I didn't land my dream job, buy a house, have a baby, or travel the world. On February 19, I suffered a concussion. (I said it was the best year, I didn't say it  was the easiest.) Unfortunately, my recovery has been painfully slow and it's far from over. My definition of a concussion: the worst hangover you've ever had mixed with some dizziness, vertigo, insomnia, balance issues, severe neck and shoulder pain, blurred vision, and migraines. It's awful. There have been periods in the last ten months where the pain was so terrible that I just wanted to die. It felt like my only option. Spoiler alert: I'm still alive. The shocking thing, however, is that I have still managed to have some of the best and happiest moments of my life. How? First off, I really need to thank my family and friends for taking care of me and for loving